Quiznos

Always seems kind of dirty. There are other Quizno’s nearby. Meh…

Went to this location once. There was a live cricket in the lettuce. Clerk removed cricket and continued making sandwich with lettuce. I took a triple take in completely exaggerated fashion, hoping to catch the eye of the sandwich clerk, but no. He simply wrapped it up and asked if we wanted to make it a combo. We walked out.

This place is pretty grimey, and the soda seems to be flat everytime I come. I can’t complain too much because I don’t have to keep coming here, but I do. It is walking distance, which is way more convenient than driving somewhere.

There is a reason this location frequently closes and reopens under new management: it is just not that good. Service is slow, the place is dirty, and your meal is going to be a hot greasy mess without any memorable flavors. Sure it’s an OK sandwich option if you are in a rush and close but I wouldn’t recommend it except as a last resort.

I’m a Subway guy. But what ultimately brought me to Quizno’s is actually kind of cute.
I won’t go into the pros and cons of Facebook in this review, since there are a plethora of message boards and disgruntled bloggers out there who take care of that. But one of the positives of the phenomenon is that it *does* bring people together who otherwise might have fallen out of touch.
Take my friend Jenna, for instance. I knew Jenna since 4^th grade in a different state, and she is one of a handful of people whose memory of her in my head was clear enough for me to not mind adding her on Facebook. We were FB friends for a while before we discovered we both had had the same crush on the same boy back in the day (as much of a crush as 4^th graders could have.) He’s actually still kind of cute, but not NEARLY as smoking hot as my 3^rd grade boyfriend, who I still don’t have the nerve to add on Facebook. But I digress.
Once I had found out Jenna worked as a developer for Quizno’s franchises (and I chided her for stealing my men), I told her to hook a brother up. And she did, sending me a Quizno’s gift certificate in a delightful holiday card. See? How sweet is that? Suck it, Facebook haters.
Brookstone had asked me to stay a week past my expiration date for my seasonal job (totally different story, way too involved for details here), mostly to help with inventory. It was supposed to be from 8:00 PM until 1:00 AM, and since I assumed corporate America would be too cheap to pay for a couple of pizzas, I decided to bring my own sack lunch so, you know, I wouldn’t die. Gift card in hand, I chose this Quizno’s because it is literally right next door to my office.
There were two guys ahead of me, and I was late. Very late. I contemplated asking the guy ahead of me if I could just play through, but it looked like he had a World of Warcraft game to get back to, and would be the type to refuse and throw a self-​righteous hissy fit. So I let the dork order. What I didn’t know was that he was ordering for three other additional presumed shut-​ins, all of whom wanted these long, complicated, um, «ingredient-​rich», sandwiches. Gross. And FML.
I tittered around and was kind of annoyed, but I assured the two young guys working that they didn’t have to feel rushed. Even though they really should have. FINALLY, Lord of the Sub Shop eventually got his stupid order together just as I was about to call Brookstone and tell them I was running late.
I ordered the Classic Club, with turkey, ham, bacon, cheddar, lettuce, tomatoes, mayo on the 9 grain artisan bread. It looked good. If you don’t want too much mayo, tell them; they were a tad liberal with it. So here’s my confession – I don’t like the sandwiches toasted. I’ll pause while everyone says «But that’s the whole point of Quizno’s!’ Yes, I am aware of that. But I have a «thing» about melted cheese, and I know I’m weird and persnickety, so just let it go and accept it. I don’t think the kid hears that too often, since his response was: «Are you sure?» The second guy asked me again if I wanted it toasted («No…»), then he wrapped up the sandwich as I poured myself a – *gasp* – carbonated diet soda.
I had visions of scarfing down the meal gifted to me by my 4^th grade friend in the dark corner of a stock room that Brookstone passes off as a break room, but it turns out they let me out early. Like, three hours early. So instead, I scarfed it down at home while watching Bravo reality shows. Much better.
I can’t wait to go back and finish up my gift card. I think I might be splitting my time between Subway and Quizno’s from now on. Unless I’m sufficiently humiliated by the employees for never, ever getting my sandwich toasted. I guess only time will tell.