Southside Saloon and Bistro

Great daily lunch specials. This place is a great little spot for a downtown deal for lunch. I have tried the burgers here and I am not a fan of the house «marinade». No one else I have been to eat with there does either, so maybe it’s not just me, but almost everything else that I have had there was really good. Their vegetables have always been fresh and the food hot off the grill. The best thing I can say is that you won’t find a better deal for lunch around this part of town.

The company I work for recently relocated to the scenic southside of Chattanooga. Having only been at this new location less than two months, my friends at work and I are still trying to discover great locations for lunch. Unfortunately this is not one of them.
Before heading off to lunch, I always look at the menu to figure out an idea of what I want. Looking at their website, which is not that bad, I found their menu had a smaller selection than most places. I thought to myself this would be a good place, not a lot to mess up, comfort food and sandwiches/​burgers served quick and tasty.
I had driven by the location that is the Southside Saloon and Bistro once before, but I did not realize it was a restaurant. Now I know you aren’t supposed to judge a book by its cover, but sometimes you need to trust your gut. The first problem encountered was the entrance to the building. It was not clearly labeled and it took us a moment until another diner who was leaving pointed it out to us. Their private, no charge parking lot is definitely the best thing about this place.
Upon entering in, the décor immediately strikes you. A mixture of old, unkempt carpets, complete food crumbs, scratched walls, and new TVs fill the dining room/​bar area. I was a bit distracted by it all when our server came to our table, and I am not sure if she mentioned her name or any daily specials, but I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt. The restaurant is definitely more Saloon than Bistro, even sporting a «Bar Rules: Bartender is always right» plaque on the walls. Their selection of beer was much larger than their selection of food. It was a quiet place for what seemed to be sports bar, all the TVs were muted and there were only two other tables filled during what would normally be a busy time for a restaurant.
Looking over the menu earlier I had my heart set on roast beef and gravy, complete with two sides. It did not take long for the food to get to the table, set up on a cafeteria style plate. Now when I order roast beef, I expect a few slices, nicely carved from a roast, and served with a brown gravy. This is not what I got.
The meat was essentially packaged lunch meat, I am not exaggerating. It was thin, salty, and rubbery. The gravy itself was so thick, gelatinous, and tasted sour. I ate an hour ago and I still have a salty taste in my mouth from this gravy. To make matters worse, I had ordered the mac and cheese and onion rings as my sides. The onion rings, obviously frozen, were deep fried and each bite would explode with oil and grease. You could not taste onion, only oil. The mac and cheese was tasteless, aside from the copious amount of grated cheese on top of the over cooked soggy noodles. Now the waitress I gave the benefit of the doubt? She never came back to our table. Not for a refill of our drinks, not even to give us the check. Another employee, who I assumed to be the manager or owner, dropped off the check, and also ran the cash register. It was so disappointing, we even returned to work well before our lunch break was over.
Looking back at this experience, I had several clues which warned me not to eat here. Their website boasts of the happy hour, live music, and seems like it would be a fun place to have a beer. And that is all you need to know. To truly enjoy this place, you would have to be drunk.

Wow. It’s been seven hours since I ate here and my stomach still hasn’t forgiven me for it.
I stopped in for lunch with a friend and I ordered a Grilled «Rueben» (yes, the misspelling is theirs, check the menu). Their sandwiches come with chips (I assume they are Ruffles… because they have ridges)… for a buck more you can have fries, or for $ 1.50 more you can have onion rings. I didn’t want any of these, so the server told me I could have a salad (or any of their other sides).
She disappeared and soon came back with a small bowl with a couple of pieces of iceberg lettuce, a huge quarter slice of tomato, and a few other «salad-​y» type things. It was accompanied by the cup of the thickest blue cheese dressing I’ve ever seen in my entire life. I turned the cup over and the blue cheese came out in a big clump on top of my salad. I had to break it up with my fork and mix it up with my «salad». There was almost as much dressing as there was salad. Not a good start.
Before I was even done with my «salad», our food was ready. This was not too surprising considering we were one of three tables in the place during the lunch rush, but I still thought it was real fast. Our plates were set down in front of us and I was ready to dig in. I grabbed one half of my sandwich and immediately felt that the bread was soggy on one side (the side on the plate)… and not just wet… soggy… soaked as in the bread turned to mush in my fingers. I took a bite and was disappointed even further. Something just didn’t taste right. After choking my way through the first half of my sandwich, I figured out what it was. It was the «sauerkraut». It was the worst tasting sauerkraut I’ve ever put in my mouth. I scraped it off the other half of my sandwich, discarded the soggy piece of bread and folded the remaining half of bread over just the corned beef… that significantly improved the sandwich and that’s not saying much.
I was also under the impression that my salad would replace my chips… but no, I got a half plate of Ruffles and a fresh from the jar pickle spear too. In fact, I paid an extra two bucks for my little tiny bowl of «salad». Obviously none of the food here is fresh. It’s bought at the grocery store, slapped together and heated in the microwave. I think this is more of a «saloon» and the «bistro» was an afterthought.
Our server never checked back with us to see how things were going. She did have plenty of time to bring the other tables their checks and to sit and talk with the cooks. In fact, she was so busy with that the cashier (a manager, maybe?) came by with the check for us just after we got our food. In a hurry, much? I mean, were they *sooo* busy that they needed the table space? I think not.
As for the décor, it didn’t seem that old… there’s been some wear and tear. Obviously, it has a little rougher life when it’s a saloon instead of a bistro. Honestly, the best part about this place? Free parking downtown.
Maybe this is a great place to listen to live music and drink beer, but stay away from the food… stay far away. My bowels still hate me after eating this stuff.