Eagle Bargain Outlet

I bet you’ve always wondered what happens when some perfectly-​good merchandise at Costco gets smashed, dinged, opened, or otherwise compromised. Like me, you probably assumed it was sent back to the manufacturer, donated to charity, or simply thrown away. Well, you and I were both wrong. These tainted goods make their clandestine way to the shelf of last resort: Eagle Bargain Outlet.
Now, you might imagine that you’ve got it figured out before I even write the next sentence. You might think, «Cool, man… green value, green choices. What the bourgeois consumer superficially rejects finds new life at fair discounts in the neo-​thrift overstock market.»
Not quiiiiiiite.
Eagle Bargain Market is a magical emporium where you can buy distressed goods for slightly less than full price, if you like. But I’m sure that doesn’t make you a sucker.
Also a place where I was delighted to learn that it’s completely legal –I assume– to sell me a ripped-​open package of tortilla chips so long as it’s been rebound with packing tape.
All sarcasm aside, the inescapable problem here is one of fair trade-​off. The merchandise is less than perfect, but the prices are not reflective of the step down in quality. Were the discounts steeper, then the value would be a matter of preference. But how can I recommend you pay $ 3.98 for a jar of Prego with a lid bent 30-​degrees when you can buy undistressed Prego for the same price elsewhere? Or a USB turntable inside a smashed box for $ 75, when it’s new on Amazon for $ 70 + S/​H?
Answer: I can’t recommend it. I can’t recommend it at all.