The Secret Theatre

Took my daughter to see Pirate Pete’s Musical the day before Easter. The play was good for small children under 8. The performers made it very interactive. It’s reasonably price and by no means expect a Broadway musical. If you want to expose your child to a variety of performances I recommend.

I am relatively new to the Off-​Off-​Broadway scene, but of the two theaters I have been to, this on is the nicer of the two. A small flag flies above the corner where the secret theater lies. It is not quite a secret, but it is definitely not obvious. The parking situation outside is pretty terrible. Once inside, though, the small front area holds both the snack bar and the box office. The space itself is quite nice. A small, 99-​seat space surrounded on three sides by tiered seating areas. The «stage» is simply the bottom level. I can imagine that the view must not be so great from the sides, though the show I saw made great use of all entrances and the actors seemed to be making an effort to engage the three sections.

We went to the Saturday afternoon children’s performance with our twin 4 ½ year olds this week. The show was an hour long and perfect for the kids with some jokes thrown in for the grown ups too. There was singing and some dancing and audience participation too.
The seating is on 3 sides but it is best to be on the front. We sat on the side and most of the action faced the front.
At the end of the show the cast greeted everyone, gave each child a piece of candy, and posed for pictures. It was very cute. We will be back for more shows in the near future.

We did the Friday night Burlesque show. It was cheap and extremely fun. These ladies are full of humor and confidence. I will recommend it for a nice, curious, and inexpensive date.

It literally is hard to find this theater & can be a «secret» to get to. Came to a show here & had a lot of fun, though. They have a nice outdoor area in front of the entrance that has to be awesome in the summer. I’d wanted to go beforehand & glad I finally got the chance. I highly recommend it for your underground shows & experiences.

The Secret Theatre is a great black-​box space to present theatre in LIC. I’m pretty sure that if it isn’t the only theatre in LIC, it’s at least the nicest.
It’s worth noting, during cold months the pipes for heat bang like a motherf**ker. So unless you are presenting a horror story or atmospheric New York apartment play, you may want to seek out another theatre.
The lighting and sound system are also a bit crossed as there is feedback in the sound system when you dim or bring up the lights. Small details that would aggravate any producer.
But other than that, the space is clean and very large and has a great feel to it. You could certainly do worse!

This is a pretty cool guerrilla performance venue that should be an asset to New York City’s independent creative community. I first encountered it as part of the 2013 Queens New Music Festival, and thought it was a good, if not great, venue for those events — intimate space, clean sound (though the staff was pretty noisy in the lobby during the performances), and overall a good environment for a curious audience to engage with new and adventurous art.
Based on that experience, I looked to the Secret Theatre as a possible venue for an event I was producing the following season. Now I found the staff to be patently unhelpful. When I called to ask for rental information, I was told that the only way to process this inquiry was via email. When I sent my inquiry via email, I never heard back. When I didn’t hear back, I sent a follow-​up email a week later. And then again a week after that. And then one last try a week and a half later. Kind of amazingly, never even an acknowledgment that my email was received. When I called to follow up, they said they couldn’t help me over the phone, and just gave me the email address again.
If the place doesn’t sufficiently have their act together to even interface with someone who’s trying to bring them business, it kind of makes you wonder what you can expect out of working with them, no? — that is, if they even ever give you the opportunity.
So, final verdict: decent venue, but if you’re an artist looking to put on a project, your time and energy are probably better spent elsewhere.

I loved this little theatre! We came here to watch the LIC One-​Act Play Festival — which, by the way, is one of the coolest neighborhood things I’ve experienced thus far — and totally enjoyed this little hidden away black-​box theatre. It feels very grass-​roots, and it’s definitely no frills, but I love that it exists as a space to showcase raw, local theatre.

A Unilocal page is tough for any theatre that is also a rental house, it’s hard to just review the space and not the show itself.
Yes, the theatre is definitely a walk from the subway and out of the way (though the area has gotten so much better!!) but, it’s such a cool space. They actually have three separate theaters.
I came to see Urinetown after the owner invited me while I was touring their multiple theaters for a future show that I’m producing. I found the space to be the same quality, if not better, than the spaces in Manhattan.
The only negative about this space was mentioned by another user, there are some big poles that can mess up sight lines, but even the UCB theater has that. Just get there early to get a better seat.
As far as Urinetown goes, I had a wonderful time and the cheap alcohol prices made it even better.
Bottom line: if you’re looking for a rental, definitely come out the one stop from Manhattan to consider it. If you’re looking for a show to see, ignore the Unilocal page for reviews. It’s like looking up the reviews for the Helen Hayes to see if Rock of Ages is any good.

I came to The Secret Theatre to watch Urinetown with a couple of my friends. I live in Astoria, so I was pretty excited that there was a theatre so close by where I didn’t have to go into/​cross through Manhattan to watch something. It’s kind of in the middle of a random stretch of road that has almost nobody walking around, which made getting there feel a bit sketchy.
There is an obvious white banner that points out the «secret» theatre, so it’s not like a speakeasy that you’ll accidentally walk by. It is a bit awkward to get to the actual lobby because you have to walk through a parking area and a loading dock of some sort, so I guess that’s what makes it feel secrety.
The lobby is very small, the size of a short hallway, and there’s a bar at the end of one side where they sell refreshments, drinks, and hand out the playbill for the performances. They did NOT check my ticket — honestly, anyone could have just walked into the theater and watched the play had they known about it. I think they need to have a system to do a check.
The theater space itself reminded me of my college theaters: small, dark, black, and three-​sided. There were (uncomfortable) seats on the sides, roughly about 4 – 5 rows, and the main seats directly in front of the stage. There are some pillars and stuff that might become obstructive if you sit in bad places. As noted before, the seats were pretty hard. Someone commented earlier that they should have brought a pillow — I second that motion. Do it, because your butt will be pretty sore, even by intermission. I sat to the right (when facing the stage. I have no idea what direction Stage-​right is) and that was a TERRIBLE choice. The orchestra (or in this case, a piano, drums, and saxophone) was seated on the balcony to our left and we could barely make out anything that the actors/​actresses were saying during the musical numbers. Seriously, it was a huge issue. The whole point of the song and dance numbers are to hear the lyrics, I mean that’s how everything is portrayed. It wasn’t just a minor inconvenience — it ruined the whole experience. I began to zone out because I couldn’t hear half the things they were saying.
So if you are trying to watch a musical/​performance, sit as close to the entrance as you can, away from the orchestra, so that your hearing is not completely flooded by the insanely loud music. Just a quick thing about Urinetown as well. I was not that impressed with it (though one of my friends was cracking up the whole time) because the humor was relatively slapstick and elementary. I’m much more of a fan of witty and intelligent humor, as I believe most people this day and age are. Anyway, not really sure if I’d come back.

I rented a white guy to see a performance titled «Rent A White Guy» on a Sunday night. With a friend who is rentable commodity for one day, we thoroughly enjoyed the production in a small space of studio #104 the cast made full usage. A bilingual performance in Chinese Mandarin with English subtitles displayed on the screen with cultural references imbued was well produced.
Secret Theatre is classified as «Off-​Off Broadway» as its multiple studio rooms are under 99 seats each by theater definition. Tickets priced at $ 18.00 and no student or senior discounts are available. This location is rather discreet under the MTA subway line 7 train at Court Square, hence the name «Secret Theatre» where appropriately named. The streets from the subway station leading to the theatre is a work in progress construction dark and dingy. A loading dock in the outside entrance confuse theater patrons for the actual entrance to the studio rooms. This large loading dock appear remnants of a former warehouse as it makes the outside foyer entrance dark, and unwelcoming. The only steps into the studio rooms were adjacent to the theater’s office on the loading dock. By mistake we entered the office firstly where I missed a step and tripped painfully. Outside the entrance a huge pile of garbage is an unwelcoming eyesore. The studio corridors is dark and dingy where I was unable to attain a view under the lime light of the leading cast photos with corresponding names.
All in all, this theater is not glamorous Broadway style but it does produces Broadway quality plays.

Well kids, this is a toughie.
The theater space is lovely and quaint, just how I like it. Unfortunately, my first and only experience with the Secret Theater is with «Advance Man” – the first part in a trilogy, I’m told. Poor Saps.
It’s not the worst show I’ve had to grin and bear, and I feel for the actors that gave a commendable effort. Truth be told, the humor was dry (not the good kind) at best, and the plot was weak (if even present).
Certainly would not get on a train for this show.
To be fair, this is technically a review of the theater – which yes, hooray.

Disclaimer: the 3 stars are for the theatre itself, not the performance (the very fun and enthralling «Full Disclosure,» which runs through December 18^th!).
Located right next to the subway tracks in Long Island City, The Secret Theatre does the best it can with limited resources, but there are a few things that take away from the overall experience unfortunately. While the close proximity to the train tracks affords this theatre a great deal of accessibility, the noise from the train invades the performance (s) you’re watching as well. Even though I was fully engrossed with «Full Disclosure,» I can remember a few times where the rumbling of the train came crashing into the theatre and I couldn’t help but notice.
I ended up in what I assume is the smaller theatre, which is down some stairs and off to the side from what I assume was the main theatre. Set-​wise, it could have been set up better, but again, they were doing the best they could with limited resources (e.g. the play itself really requires a full house for a set and all they had was the one room).
However, despite those few detractions, I really enjoyed my time at The Secret Theatre last week. The performances that are held here are a lot of fun to watch, and the prices make these performances incredibly accessible for even the thriftiest (or, in some cases, poorest) of audiences. They appear to have a food, drink, and beer/​wine selection as well, but I did not partake in that. I’d come back for a show that I was really interested in watching. With a bit of upkeep to their sets and perhaps some soundproofing, The Secret Theatre would be a nearly flawless place to take in a show.

I think this place is awesome.
I’ve only been to the basement portion for a little party hosted by folks associated with the theater or theatre. It is small only big enough for 40 people to fill it up.
The names serves the place well too. fortunately it’s the only thing on the block with anything going on so it’s not impossible to find just off the beaten path. Who needs the LES filled with endless bars and other people, Sartre comes to mind.
In front of the theater there is a loading dock that I was told will be a summer concert venue. I will be back for those.
It’s too bad there isn’t a real bar. The drinks were served by more folks. You had four choices; bottled water $ 2, Coors light in solo cups $ 3, Wine $ 4, or a mixed beverage $ 5. Perfect. I’m sure this changes depending on the party.
Let me know if you are going to this place for anything fun.

Unilocal Night at the Astoria/​LIC International Film Festival on Sunday Oct. 24–
I attended a Unilocal Night at the Secret Theater for the showing of the movie «Polygamy» and the short films «Walk the Fish» and «Love and Other Red Spot Specials.»
I was fortunate to catch Jason P.‘s review of the Secret Theater and his photos before attending the film festival on Sunday. This eliminated any high expectation I may have about this this theater and the «LIC International Film Festival.» So no black tie required.
The Theater site obviously had a previous life as a factory. The entrance is located on the other side of a truck loading dock. If you missed the sign out on the sidewalk you can walk right by and end up lost.
The ticket office was not obvious and the «lobby» is very small with a couple of chairs, table and a sofa.
I got there early and other Unilocalers like Helena and Elle arrived close to show time.
The theater is a very large multi-​functional room with folder chairs and a large (6 – 8 feet) projection screen. If a large guy is sitting in front of you, you are not going to see much and will have to move. The room’s sound system is adequate and a stage behind the screen is setup for other music presentations and bands. It has a capacity of maybe 200+ people.
There are three single-​use restrooms on the side so you don’t have to go far if you have to go.
The highlight of my visit is the Int’l Film Festival. Tonight the main feature is a Hungarian film by Director Denes Orosz titled «Polygamy»; subtitled in English.
Film comment:
Polygamy– This is a very entertaining and funny film.
The story is well written screen play; the film quality is professional and the good editing which helped move the story along at a fast pace and kept us laughing. You also have to read fast to catch the jokes. The story is not predictable and holds your attention. I couldn’t predict the direction of the story at all. From the film title and description I did not get the full appreciation until I finished watching the film.
Walk the Fish– This short film requires some interpretation and the slow pace of the film maybe intentional of the director. The way I see it, the story is about a young man’s struggle to get through the challenges of early life; unable to hold a job, no direction, lacking education, and disappointments. The young man agonizes and struggles with the world around him. His friends play jokes on him and makes fun of his lack of smarts. His «girl friend» is not who he dreamed to be has matured and moved onto a new relationship. He immaturity does not allow him to be comfort with someone else. The «Fish» part of this film is a metaphor for his life? I can spend hours with Elle on this topic.
Love and Other Red Spot Specials– funny and cure story of a misfit in a small town. There is a cute twist at the end.
Overall it was an enjoyable evening; I did not take advantage of the cheap snacks and $ 3 beer; another time.

I’m reviewing the PLACE, not the MOVIE (which I’ll give 4 stars to Polygamy)
It’s not far away from the train stations, but Can you be at least more Hidden than this?
The only way I found this place if thru a picture I saw on Unilocal! otherwise, i would have called for HELP!
It’s just a Empty studio with folding chairs about 50 of them, a 6X 6 ft. handy screen (that can pulls up and rolls back down) with 2 JUMBO Speakers on the side.
I don’t consider this a theatre, but since Unilocal posted some international films thru here and I say «why not»
The Movie was 1:30 Hr., I sat and watched my movie but i kept moving around since the chair didn’t have much «CUSHION» for my Tush. But with the company of Elle P. and Rich W. I made it thru the end!
If it wasn’t because of the great movie «POLYGAMY» I wouldn’t have know this place was hidden.
The good side: Beers $ 3.00, Soda can $ 1.00, Candies $ 1.00. SO it’s cheaper than a movie theatre.
Funny part: 7 Train passes by every 10 minutes, but you don’t hear it inside the room. SOUNDPROOF BABY!

Far from a theater, the place has stage lights where an improv or small screening can be shown with metal chairs and benches. It looks more like a loading dock with a hallway of small rooms. We came here for the first Astoria /​Long Island City Film Festival, and the place was hugely disorganized taking 40+ minutes to get the chairs set up, people seated, and lights dimmed. When they finally got the movie playing, there were difficulties playing the movie (sound played but laggy video), so they played a short film in the meanwhile which wasted another 30 minutes. By this time, about a hour and 15 minutes had passed and they still had difficulties. I truly think they need to get things organized. However on the bright side, they had cheap snacks like $ 3 beer.

I was lucky enough to be invited to a recent production of The Tempest. This is an example of theater in its purest form. Costumes were unitards and there was little by way of props. Still, the acting, staging, and creative use of silks for acrobatics made this a memorable performance. Given that there were a mere 50 seats surrounding the stage, the audience quickly became part of the production. I cost only $ 15.00 to witness an intense and sincere enactment of Shakespeare on the Bard’s birthday (and deathiversary) – a worthwhile investment.
Oh! Wine was only $ 5.00 a glass and beer was $ 3.00 at intermission :)