Churches Fried Chicken

I like everything about White Castle and Church’s

This joint is attached to the Canton White Castle. Enough said. Sorry but I loathe White Castle.
My husband brought this home one night. I can see his logic, I do like fried chicken and it is right off the freeway on the way to our abode. I cringe at the thought of entering the building as the trademark Castle smell would be just too much for me. Long story which involves needing a sick bag or two but I can’t eat or deal with the aroma of White Castle since a particularly heinous incident.
Take out chicken though, sure, I am up for that. We had this stuff quite awhile back and I remember the Churches chicken being fairly decent. The sides were wretched with the exception of the honey butter biscuits but the chicken was nothing to sneeze at, particularly the hulking wings. The spicy varietal of course being my poison of choice. Flash forward to a couple weeks back… yikes. I have not wanted to write this review as I will just become nauseous again. Frankly I would have rather eaten a Castle. From me that is a bold statement indeed.
I don’t know what they did to that chicken. Have you ever seen Christmas Vacation? The scene where Clark goes to carve the turkey and it dissolves in a grey cloud? Yeah thats what it tasted like, partially cremated poultry. The skin was the type of greasy that it actually becomes a dry mist, the flesh was wispy baby fine strands of disgusting unchewable bits of putrified death barely covering singed bones. It was foul. Pardon the pun but yes I ate foul fowl, one whole bite of it to be exact. I actually spit it out like a picky three year old so I guess ate is a bit of a stretch but I did have to freaking taste that. I had to rinse and repeat (and maybe repeat again) with tequila and lime to get rid of the disgusting aftertaste. This was the type of experience though that could conceivably put a girl off fried chicken for quite awhile.
My ass thanks you Churches’ chicken. My arteries salute you. My dietician will be sending a plaque. The thought of eating fried chicken is sort of making me throw up in my mouth a little.