McDonald’s Shijo Takasegawa

Being the responsible Unilocaler that I am, I have a personal policy where I don’t write reviews of fast food restaurants because well… they in most of the cases suck, and are not worth writing about at all. Like everything else in life, however, there are a few exceptions to policy when it comes to personal policy — if said fast food chain is an anomaly from other fast food chains of the same caliber, I will usually try to leave a check-​in note of some sort or annotate my amusement in the form of a review.
Never in a million years have I ever thought about writing a review on a McDonalds, or giving it anything other than a 1 or 2 star review. Before you start throwing tomatoes and lettuce onto the stage, I’m going to lead off with a hypothetical: imagine a world where everything is exactly as advertised; where the food being served at fast food restaurants actually DO look like their respective pictures used for advertising purposes.
Well, friend-​o, this hypothetically magical place that will take every fiber of your being by wonderment is called «Japan.»
I absolutely had no desire to go to McDonalds while I was in Japan for millions of reasons; the fact that it’s globally ubiquitous being one, the fact that it fails as a culinary establishment in so many ways in so many of their other locations being two, and the fact that I was in Japan surrounded by amazing Japanese food that cost less than or equal to a small Big Mac meal being three.
For some odd reason, one of my coworkers (who was from Texas and of Caucasian origin… not like it matters) made a habit of going to McDonalds before work everyday. Notwithstanding the fact that the man went to McDonalds every damn morning in Japan which is as just as horrible as… going to McDonalds every damn morning in Japan, he reported the food there to be «different» and «so much better» than the McDonalds he’s had anywhere else.
For the first two weeks of working with this guy, those very statements that came out of his mouth made me question everything else he said, but after getting to know him better, he turned out to be a stand-​up guy, so I started taking his advice a little more seriously.
The fateful day when I questioned every inch of my Unilocal credential came when my coworker had alerted me to the presence of the 1000-​yen burger series. The name sounded terrible, the premise sounded terrible, and on top of everything it was being advertised by Keisuke Honda (of AC Milan fame). Fully realizing that two wrongs don’t make a right, no less three, I reluctantly agreed to go to McDonalds for lunch and try out the 1000-​yen burger.
Long story short, the burger had Chorizo and Avocado and turned out to be one of the better burgers I’ve had in my entire life (look at attached picture for details). Damn, you so cray cray Japan.