The Boat

Target audience: Dancers, prancers, hipsters and. whatever rhymes with that.
The Boat is one of the top venues for a casual and low maintenance dance night.
IT LOOKS LIKE A BOAT. Inside, it’s an old submarine. There is wood paneling everywhere and mirrors that look like portholes. They have a big dance floor and stage. Both get packed with dancers.
2 Disco Balls. One of which is shaped like the Death Star.
Cover is typically low. Drinks are cheap, at $ 5 for basics.
They host a series of monthly dance events, which are listed on their website:
Bartenders are quick but not certified mixologists. Give them a break. Don’t ask a series of complicated questions about a specific beer like one girl in front of me did.
(sample of ~20 dance nights)
P. S. I miss Going Steady and Chronologic at The Boat.

Had a great time here, great tasteful music and cool atmosphere. bartenders were so friendly and catered to our every drinking need! :D would definitely come back for more good times!!!

Friends and I went to the Boat on a Saturday of Thanksgiving. It’s a smaller, cozy club that is full at about 150 people. It was Funk Off and a ton of fun. The drinks are very reasonably priced and the service is friendly.
Great place to just have fun without the downtown club attitude.
Definitely going to be one of my regular spots.

Board The Boat and become 100x more hipster by the time you walk out. Vibe and atmosphere will make you feel welcome always. It’s totally unassuming ousife making it all the more alluring as one of Toronto’s underdog hangouts. If you chill all the time chill here. If you can’t think of anywhere to chill… chill here. Whatever you do chill here.

Fun dive bar for drinking and dancing. Super old school interior. The inside looks like you just stepped onto a 1970’s boat cruise. Dj’s, a bumpin sound system and everyone dancing wall to wall. What can I say good times. Just be careful about cutting a rug on the raised stage. I saw someone take a header right off of it.

Definitely an awesome place to check out! Who doesn’t like partying in a boat? Also, once a month is funk off, which is amazing especially when the soul train gets going…

Great DJs and choices of music from all genres and eras. Awesome dance floor and crowd (no annoying teenage kids, if there is, they behave like an adult). No need to dress up in your skimpy tight mini dress and hooker heels for the ladies. Been to the Yacht Rock and F’Unreal themed nights and they’re both awesome!

You gotta check it out on a funk night «Funk Off». I used to go to funk nights at Call the Office in London, ON when I went to western, and this is a true funk night.
Really happy I found it.

Cheap cover, ok music, decent venue!

Great venue!
Went to The Boat on NYE and had a blast! Cheap drinks and coat check. Cover wasn’t too bad considering it was NYE (only $ 10).
Overall vibe, crowd and music was amazing! Love the fact that they play old school dance music. It kind of reminded me of Stones Place (which is definitely a favourite of mine), but with more upbeat classic dance hits.
If you’re looking to have a good time with friends in a chilled atmosphere where you could dance the night away, I would highly recommend The Boat.
I will definitely be visiting again soon!

Totally on board this boat. But, only in the context of specific gigs.
I’ve never actually just gone here. But then I never do with bars or clubs. I always go because I’m going to see a particular band or DJ. I’m weird. Also, my time and money is precious.
I probably would if I lived in the area.
ANYWAY, I saw the Hoa Hoas perform one of their final shows here. And I think Fjord Rowboat’s last gig was here. Absolutely great times – the kind of times that make me think, «Yeah, my former LA has nothing on Toronto. There is a real scene here. Even if you are into neo-​gazer or neu-​psych or whatever you can enjoy it with like minded fans keeping it real. Plus, you don’t need a car!»
Beers are cheap. Service is good. No idea about the food – would never think to eat here. The crowd/​vibe has always been good but in that young, hip Kingsington Market way. Without a beard or metal or ink I’d probably stand out on the average night.
Recommended. I’m sure I’ll be back some night.

Okay. I guess I should lighten up a bit on the Boat. My first review is absolutely true, but since then I have been back to the Boat for two separate parties and both have been good. Yes, the place still smells like urine and vomit, but the drinks are a reasonable price and this time I opted for something other than wine. And really Juliana. Who orders wine at a place like this? In short, it is a sketchy campy venue, but it has a decent dance floor so it serves its purpose.

With every corner turned in Kensington Market I always seem to find something cool and quirky that makes me say to myself «damn I love this place,» or «what a cool idea.» Herein lies the spirit of great independent businesses.
Visiting for a friends birthday this past weekend, I had very little in the way of expectations other than, a) this place is in kensington, and b) it looks like a boat. Now I’ll be honest i was mildly disappointed when the image of partying on a tall ship randomly placed in the market didn’t come to fruition BUT what lay inside far exceeded the hipster boat party in my mind.
The décor of The Boat is literally the inside… of a boat. Port holes, wood paneling, intricate woodworking around the bar, etc, etc. The dimly lite space gives off the feel that you’re below the deck (as opposed to two stories up from the street), and after a few cocktails (which I might add they don’t skimp on), you might need to hold onto something while you get your sea legs.
Saturday seems to be retro dance party night (and I mean late 80’s early 90’s retro) Phil Collins, Tears for Fears, Prince, MJ, Mike and the Mechanics, etc, etc, essentially the soundtracks of Donnie Darko and American Psycho all rolled into one. For me this was bliss, able to sing and dance to real music (not just sounds created by European DJ’s that you take Ecstasy and toss glowsticks around to).
Pro-​Tips:
1) Get there early (before 11PM) to guarantee you get in, as a swarm of people literally arrive and the place fills up after that point.
2) Cover charge is $ 5 (standard for Toronto) but have cash on hand b/​c…
3) They don’t have an ATM on site, but you can pay for your drinks by debit at the bar

Came here last night and had a kick *donkey* time !
The interior is supposed to look like a boat, which is pretty neat. There’s a stage, a dance floor, and a searing area. If you get tired, you can always sit at one of the tables. There is cover, but it was $ 5 so nothing too ridiculous. Drinks were pretty reasonable as well; my Rolling Rock was $ 5. The drink menu isn’t too large, but it’s enough. Now to the music — this place has a pretty big dance floor with fun music (variety of genres) that you can dance to. There were some pretty interesting dance moves that I saw; everyone here was having fun. It had a casual atmosphere and everyone was there to enjoy drinks and dance. All around a great time at The Boat, can’t wait to go back.
Good for: a night out, dancing

Went here Friday Night, its definetly always full here and has it own vibe. The vibe is kensington hipster. Its one of those places where it is best to get bottled beer and just try to enjoy the vibe.

I had an awhsum time here!!! It opens at 10pm on a Friday, so of course we showed up at 9 and it was closed… buuuttt we went to Handlebar right across the street and loaded up on some Amsterdam blonde while we waited.
I would HIGHLY suggest that you go here early. We were the first ones in there, obviously, but it was so worth it cuz we got a massive table and occupied it the whole night. At 1130, i walked out of the bathroom into a completely packed place. I don’t know if these people fell from the sky but they were IN THERE AND THEY WAS STAYIN…
Friday was 90s and r&b night, not exactly my type of jam — but i danced anyway. We didn’t pay any cover, all the staff were easy going and nice and the drinks were cheeeap! 4.50 for a Canadian is my kinda price

I. LOVE. this place.
I love that it looks like an old community centre from the 70s. I love that they have big tables with seating, as if you were at a prom. And I love the music they play and the casual atmosphere.
I’ve never had a bad time at this place.

A hipster in Yorkville whose dog kept licking my hand recommended this place to me. I knew he was a hipster because he spoke in a fake Manchester accent. Anyway I went there — walked up to the door only to hear some slightly raised voice behind me mumble something about ID. I turned around and some hipster in a beard (who I would’ve mistook for any random dude) apparently wanted to see ID, at least I assumed that’s what he wanted.
Walked upstairs and into the space, ignoring the girl charging cover. There’s a small bar run by a couple older folks –probably the hipster «doorman’s» parents. I got a steamwhistle (obviously) and slowly gravitated towards the stage. The interior is very much like a boat in the sense that one wall has those circular windows (port holes) and there’s a lot of wood. The music was progressive 70s and 80s but I missed all the Peter Gabriel which is why this is a 4 and not a 5.
Eventually the lights came on and I realized I was on the stage still and it was only 2:30. I realized at that point all the remaining people were in santa hats except for me, so I gave everyone the finger, yelled «merry Christmas dicks» and promptly left.

I have only been here for the Chronologic party so far, but their other theme nights sound very intriguing to me. I love that they have theme nights like ’70−80s dance music, songs from the movies, and in particular Chronologic where they play music from 1890-​present day.
I love the grungy atmosphere of the place with the old carpet and banquet style chairs. It made me feel like I stepped back in time, in a good way. There was lots of seating space if people wanted to chat. They also had a large dance floor with a small stage.
Cover was only $ 5! Can’t beat that in Toronto. And coat check was $ 1. Drinks were really cheap as well.
The one crappy thing is that you have to get there so early. I generally don’t go out until later in the evening, so having to line up before the bar even opens just to make sure I get in kind of sucks. There was literally a mob of people outside waiting to get in before the bar opened because it fills up so quickly.
I had a great time at The Boat and am really looking forward to checking it out again for Chronologic and some of the other parties as well.

So I usually am not the biggest fan of this type of joint where it’s frequented by more hipper people than me, but I had more fun than I thought with their fun DJ’n which kept switching from songs I was familiar to a bit more obscure options which most people still went crazy over doing their own little dance moves. But for the most part, if you’re looking for a good time on a dance floor with a fun crowd this would be a good option for you if you don’t want to go all the way to Stones Place or something like that.
I’m not a fan of their dingy bar, but drinks were cheap and bartenders were not rude? At least they don’t pretend to be anything they are not with beef jerky being their top menu item for $ 6. Their second item you ask? TWO beef jerky packs for $ 10.
Sure their deco makes it out to be like inside of a boat, but it’s really nothing special, their chairs were old, some broken and the carpet by the dance floor was sticky.
I guess no one comes in here looking for a fancy club like deco or atmosphere, but run down plain fun is definitely to be had here regardless of if you come in with a small or big group.