Anna’s Go-Go Academy

I was looking for this book launch in the Trades Hall building (I promise, it’s true) and I accidentally walked in on the go-​go dancers cutting up their shit and man was I enamoured. There were all these hot girls (and a few brave dudes) doin’ the most radical go-​go, I was mesmerised. The the leader told me to join in and I fuckin’ freaked out. I have no rhythm, you see, and there was no way I was gonna get involved. Then they all swarmed me, circled me and cajoled me until I couldn’t get away. So I started busting out these sick hip hop moves I’d picked up in my youth and they all just stared at me. Then the music stopped and they all just started walking away and chatting amongst themselves but I kept dancing and dancing like a man possessed. Then the lights went out and everyone had left apart from the bar keep and she silently golf clapped me and I walked out, sweaty and exhausted into the night. True story.